SHOLAY REVISITED, THIS TIME IN THE SOFTWARE INDUSTRY

Gabbar sends Kaalia and two others to Ramgad to collect the loot-maar software he had ordered.

They reach Ramgad and start shouting: "Abe O Thakur! Kahan hai woh loot-maar software? Last date to kab ka nikal gaya".

THAKUR (wild with ragae): "Chillao mat! jaakar Gabbar se kah do ki Thakur software walon ne paagal kutton ke liye software banana bund kar diya hai."

KAALIA: "Bahoot garmi dikha rahe ho thakur? Koi naye programmers hire kiye hain kya?"

THAKUR: "Nazar uttha ke dekh, Kaalia, tere sar par powerbuilder chal raha hai."

Kaalia looks up and sees Viru (Dharmendra) working on a PC on one water tank and Jay (Amitabh) on a laptop on another.

KAALIA (laughing out loudly): "Ha ha... thakur ne freshers ko liya hai ye log programming karenge? In ko to DOS commands bhi nahin aate."

VEERU (shouts): "Chup-chaap chala ja kutte. Hum log consultants hain, kuch bhi kar sakte hain."

JAY (hits his keyboard, then says): "jaao kaalia, Gabbar se kahna ki uska server down ho gaya."

GABBAR'S DEN...

GABBAR: "Kitne bugs the?"

KAALIA: "Do sarkaar."

GABBAR: "Wo do! Aur tum teen. Phir bhi fix nahi kar sake? Kya soch key aaye ho? Gabbar bahoot khush hoga? Naya assignment dega ...aur increment bhi? Iski saza milegi... barobar milegi.

(Snatches an X terminal from Samba).

"Kitne sessions hain is machine mein?"

SAMBA: "Chhey sarkaar."

GABBAR: "Session chhey aur programmer teen. Bahoot naainsaafi hai."

(logout - logout - logout). "Haan ab theek hai... ab tera kya hoga Kaalia?"

KAALIA: "Sarkaar, maine aapka code likha tha."

GABBAR: "To ab documentation kar!

Bhoomika brings her boyfriend into the open

A couple of weeks back Bhoomika Chawla has been raving about love with a film scribe. How it is a wonderful feeling, and how nothing can come anywhere near that feeling. Of course, it was meant to keep the scribe guessing whether she is in love or not. That is a subtle way politicians and film stars adopt when they want to tell something to the world. And, naturally, taking the cue from Bhoomika, he did what only a journalist can do: have the answer straight from Bhoomika's mouth, whether she was seeing anyone. At least, unlike the Bollywood actresses, she did not bullshit the fact saying that we are just 'best friends'. The Missamma actress said that she was indeed seeing someone and made no bones about it. And, she said that she would reveal his name "when the time comes". That is another way of building up expectation around the love affair. Expectedly, she brought him out into the open. And the occasion was the audio release function of her latest film Satyabhama on Monday. She walked into the function with her hands tucked into her beaus's, and as both of them walked into the arena, all eyes were fixed on them. Her beau, Bharat Thakur, we are told is a yoga exponent and a hotelier in Goa. And it looks that he not only taught her yoga, but the finer intricacies of love too! Talking later, Bhoomika said, "Today I am very happy. As Bharat is with me, my happiness is doubled." Well, Bhoomika, it's unfair to give your fans a hearbreak! Well fans, for now you can only see the photograph and admire Bhoomika's beau the way your've admired her.